violetpearl's Xanga

Friday, May 06, 2005

Fri, 06 May 2005 14:31:10 GMT

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Thursday, September 30, 2004

Thu, 30 Sep 2004 17:24:27 GMT

to my loyal friends and readers, please do update your link, for i have decided to move back to my old turf: http://violetpearl.blogspot.com .

thank you...i bid you adieu...au revoir...until we meet again...

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Wed, 15 Sep 2004 17:45:16 GMT

Partial Good-Bye

One of the first Profiles I had on Friendster contained the statement "I am one of the most loyal people you will ever meet" in my About Me. I really am. I am so loyal, it's insane sometimes. When I have started to trust someone, or formed a friendship with someone, I will stick by that person for as long as I have to. This is probably the best explanation for why I have about a gazillion friends, and I try to locate old friends in Friendster when I find the time. I remain loyal to all my friends, and only stray away from them when I really have to, like in the event that they aren't worthy to be called "friends" anymore.

Xanga was not my first choice for online journaling. I can't recall exactly how I discovered this site. I remember deciding early on that I'll be using this journal to post in Tagalog, haha. Well, obviously that plan didn't push through. Anyway, I really don't want this to be a lengthy post because I just wanted to let all you guys know that I have decided to return to my old HOME. This was the very first place I learned HTML codes, I've spent sleepless nights trying to fix my templates here, and I've had this account for about 2 years already. Handling 2 online journals is too much for me. I may post once in a while here, but my mainstay will be over there. I hope you'll drop by. Thanks to everyone who left comments here...

Sunday, September 12, 2004

Sun, 12 Sep 2004 15:22:28 GMT

Hooray! I finally got to exercise and play some sports. Ok, ok, I didn't exactly PLAY sports. So I just shot a few baskets, at least I got to run some laps and jump into the air. Haha! I miss being able to shoot some hoops. I'm not necessarily a basketball player; I just know how to toss a ball without looking like a doofus, and I can make a few good baskets if I really tried. Ah, the perks of growing up in front of a Basketball Court surrounded by a brother and a father who ALMOST played Professional basketball.

I remember when my brother refused to let me tag along with him and his friends when they played a game or two. His best friend, who happened to be my first boyfriend's older brother once accompanied me on the court, and taught me how to shoot a basket using the board. Man, that was so cool! He let me shoot a number of times until he called out "Perfect!"

Yesterday, I tried to recall his suggestions when I was first beginning to learn the basic of shooting the ball. After a few mistries, I got the hang of it. *sigh* Memories, memories, memories, oh sweet they all are...

Friday, September 10, 2004

Fri, 10 Sep 2004 17:18:59 GMT

Will The Real Mr. Change-A-Lot Please Stand Up

I always considered myself CHANGE's number one detractor. I've never been a really big fan of it, and how often things have to change. Then lately I've noticed that I've been changing the layouts of my online journals too often, so I decided it was about time for me to finally write about "change."

My life is a never-ending thread of changes. Some of my close friends probably think that I should be accustomed to it by now because I've had to go through them almost my whole life. A few months after I turned a year old, I had to move to another country. A few months after that, I had to move to yet another country. At age 7, I returned to the Philippines to start first grade. And after two years in that school, I had to change schools. Everything was going well for me, then after my Freshman year in high school, I welcomed change once more. My family had decided to move. There I found myself in a new city, studying in a new school, meeting new friends, wearing new school uniform, learning a new dialect, and adjusting to a new life. Two years later, we moved to a new house. After another two years, change wanted me to move to another country. And ever since I arrived in the United States, Change has never ceased to give me another dose of "changing time," for I am constantly on the move.

Moving is the worst thing about my life. It seems like it's written in the stars, on the palm of my hands, like it's my destiny. I've always wondered what my life would be like had my family stayed put, and I wonder when this constant "on-the-go" will ever end. The good thing about all of this, though, is that I've met a ton of nice people, I met my boyfriend, and I've proven who my true friends are because they have stayed in touch.

And last night as NBC's Must-See-TV-Thursdays line-up premiered its new seasons, I noticed changes as well. Joey Tribianni left his Friends in New York to start his new life in Los Angeles. His sister Gina refused to let her 20-year old son move out of her house because she didn't want things to change, so we find Joey telling his sister thatchange is hard to accept, but there's nothing else we can do about it. He's right! All we can do is roll with it. If it gets unbearable, we just have to suck it all in. We have to find a way to make it a pleasing experience. Donald Trump's The Apprentice also made changes. Instead of just 16 hopefuls, there are now 18. The camera angles are different, there are new challenges, and the suite the applicants is different. There is a saying: "the more things change, the more thay stay the same." Not quite true. For me, the more things change, the more things change. The scary part is that change is permanent, it is forever. It is impossible to make things (or people) go back to the way they once were. When they get somewhere new, it's hard to turn things around. I've lost some friends because they've changed. They started hanging out with a different crowd. Time is a big factor in change. It changes all of us, for we all get older, we mature, we learn new things, and accept new ideas. The Backstreet Boys croon "change can be so good." A few lines later, they belt out, "time goes on and on everyday. time is what it is, come what may."

Through the years, I've struggled to be the same person. I guess in a way I've been successful because my friends who've known me since I was thirteen still run to me when they need someone to listen to their problem, and give them advice. They know that I am still the one who is frank enough to tell them what the reality is and the practical thing to do. I still listen to the same kind of music - the streamline pop and contemporary music. I still have the same celebrity crushes. Man, I've been crushing on Prince William for 11 years now! I have never grown tired of loving my boyfriend of six years. I've held on to my stuff dolls and letters from friends and relatives. I still dress the same way I dressed in the Philippines almost 3 years ago. My favorite color is still the one I loved in the 5th grade. I still like to wear my hair long. And I still drive people crazy when I decide to let my fingernails grow long once in a while.

Basically, I'm still very much me. I still speak my mind without thinking sometimes. I still give sensible advice. I still sleep with a stuff animals. I still don't wear make-up except when I REALLY have to. And I am still a little kid at heart.

My surroundings seem to have changed without me. I'm not bothered by it, mind you. I certainly hope that it just goes on minding its own business as I would like to live my life as I please. If change is forever, then forever should make me happy. But change doesn't always make me happy. For the most part, I've been in tears whenever Change poked its ugly head at me. Smiles haven't been accompanying Change for quite a while. I wonder if that will happen anytime soon. I'll let ya know. For the meantime, I'll enjoy changing my layouts as much as I wish...

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

Tue, 07 Sep 2004 14:20:10 GMT

[ .01. ] first name: laureen anne
[ .02. ] middle name: gonzales
[ .03. ] last name: zaragoza
[ .04. ] nickname: LA, Laurie, Lau
[ .05. ] gender: female
[ .06. ] birthday: june 22
[ .07. ] height: 5'5
[ .08. ] hair color: dark brown
[ .19. ] eye color: dark brown
[ .11. ] race: Asian
[ .12. ] do you wear glasses or contacts: glasses
[ .13. ] do you have braces: nope
[ .14. ] is your hair long or short: long
[ .15. ] where were you born?: Quezon City
[ .16. ] current location: Tampa, FL
[ .17. ] zodiac sign: Cancer
[ .18. ] how many languages do know: 3
[ .19. ] nationality: Filipino
[ .20. ] bad habits: Twirling hair
[ .21. ] piercings you have: 2
[ .22. ] piercings you want: 2 more on my ears
[ .23. ] tattoos you have: none
[ .24. ] tattoos you want: no thanks
[ .25. ] today's date: september 7
[ .26. ] the time: 11 am
[ .27. ] ready for more questions?: sure

. : School : .
[ .43. ] are you still in school: yes
[ .44. ] did you drop out: for a while in 2001
[ .45. ] current GPA, or last GPA: 3.5
[ .46. ] favorite grade: A
[ .47. ] least favorite grade: F
[ .49. ] least favorite teacher: none
[ .50. ] favorite subjects: Psyc & English
[ .51. ] least favorite subject: Science & Math subjects
[ .52. ] do you buy lunch or bring it: buy
[ .53. ] play any sports on the school's team: i used to
[ .54. ] do you do any extracurricular : i did before
[ .56. ] favorite dance: none
[ .57. ] least favorite dance: dunno
[ .58. ] favorite memory: high school stuff
[ .59. ] least favorite memory: humiliating memories
[ .60. ] most humiliating moment/s: a lot of 'em
[ .61. ] number(s): 2, 22, 25
[ .62. ] clothing brand: i can wear any brand
[ .63. ] shoes: Waltz, Montego Bay, Sketchers
[ .64. ] saying(s): Think positive
[ .65. ] TV Show: Friends, Monk, American Idol, Whose line is it anyway?, etc.
[ .66. ] sport: Track
[ .67. ] vegetables: none
[ .68. ] fruit: peaches
[ .70. ] magazine: People
[ .71. ] actor: Adam Sandler, Ben Stiller, Tom Hanks, Keanu Reeves, Robin Williams, Steve Martin, Eddie Murphy
[ .72. ] actress: Reece Witherspoon, Drew Barrymore, Meg Ryan, Sandra Bullock, Jennifer Aniston
[ .73. ] candy: Mentos, Gummies
[ .74. ] gum: Tarzan
[ .75. ] scent: White Musk, Berries
[ .76. ] chocolate: Reese Peanut Butter Cups, Cadbury, Ferrero Rocher, Hershey's with Almonds
[ .77. ] ice cream flavor: Cookies & Cream
[ .78. ] color/s : all shades of purple
[ .79. ] seasons: Fall
[ .80. ] holidays: Christmas, 4th of July
[ .81. ] bands: BSB, Simple Plan, Yellowcard, RHCP, Parokya ni Edgar, E-heads, MXPX, Maroon5, Black Eyed Peas
[ .82. ] singers: Clay Aiken, Michelle Branch, Pink, Shania Twain, Celine Dion, Avril Lavigne, Sheryl Crow, Josh Groban, Lauryn Hill
[ .83. ] group: none
[ .84. ] rapper: Eminem?
[ .85. ] type of music: Pop, Alternative, Rock, Reggae, Soul, Doo-Wop, Country
[ .86. ] numbers: 2, 22, 25
[ .87. ] place to be: Cebu
[ .88. ] radio stations: 101.5 WDUV, 97X
[ .89. ] TV channels: ABC, NBC, USA, FOX
[ .90. ] junk food: Potato Chips, Popcorn
[ .91. ] overall food: American, Filipino, Thai, Italian, Mexican & Chinese food
[ .92. ] store: Payless Shoe Source, Target & Walmart, they have everything I need, hehe
[ .94. ] fast food: KFC, McDonald's, Jack in the Box, Burger King
[ .95. ] restaurant: Krua Thai
[ .96. ] shape: hexagon?
[ .97. ] person you have a crush on: Marat Safin, Prince William, Keanu Reeves
[ .98. ] coolest people you know: my friends Ü
[ .99. ] favorite song: Because You Loved Me, I Could Not Ask for More, I Will Carry You, Forever and for Always, If You're Not the One, Through the Years
[ .100.] favorite person(s): myself

Sunday, September 05, 2004

Sun, 05 Sep 2004 22:55:42 GMT

Birthdays, Hurricanes, and Boredom

Ok, this is going to be short. I just thought I'd stop by and tell the world how bored I am, haha It's my great grandmother's 99th birthday today-had she been alive, though. I really miss her *sniffs* I was, like, 6 years old when she passed away, and I was out of the country that time . She took care of my brother and me when we were younger, so we were pretty close.

There's a hurricane watch for today looming over Florida . My brother and I were bored, so we made a video. It's pretty cool, and not to mention, rather dizzying, haha. Now we're wondering where we could upload it to show the world, ahaha. Any suggestions, people?

Hmmm, I guess this is it for now. Take care, ppl...

Saturday, September 04, 2004

Sat, 04 Sep 2004 15:38:38 GMT

Last Possible Second

Ok, tell me if you can understand why there are jst some creatures that yearn for you to suffer. Every single time I go out to get the mail, or when I have an errand to make, these miniature reptiles just spring on me the same time I take a step. They're there a whole friggin' day, yet they decide to cross my path that same second when they should know that I am freaked out by their slimy bodies and beady eyes. Well, sure they don't know they freak me out, but hey, I do have a point though. They have the whole day to cross the sidewalk for crying out loud, yet they choose to cross it the same time my foot lands on the ground. What the heck?! Ok, ok, I might be over-reacting here, but seriously, these lizards aren't the only "things" that bother me this way.

There are also those people who decide on the last minute (or second) to tell you something. Wouldn't it be so much better if we told a friend as soon as we find out instead of waiting for daysss before telling them? If the piece of news is heartbreaking, why prolong the wait. It isn't like time will soften its blow. There are so many people in my life that practice this silly behavior. If they wanted to share some sob story with me or tell me some exciting tidbit about their life, all they have to do is blurt it out.

Hmmm, why am I even talking about this? I really can't think of anyone who should be telling me anything anyway. Well, blame those nasty lizards!

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

Wed, 01 Sep 2004 21:31:16 GMT

What do you do when you find out someone you trust tremendously breaks that promise exchanged between the both of you? My friend and I have been talking about some issue which we both agreed on the same decision, and what we should do about something. Man, I thought it was clearer than the night sky, but was I so wrong because in just a span of two days my friend broke his promise. he even ckaimed that he forgot about what we were talking about. Geez, well, whatever.

Then another friend of mine finally showed her presence to me. Gawd, I missed that girl a ton. She was my very best friend our Freshman year in high school. I've been finding a lot of friends on Friendster. It's still a little tricky coz I can't search for them in full-swing because of my lack of World Wide Web access-sadness. Oh well, I'll get a computer eventually.

Saturday, August 07, 2004

Sat, 07 Aug 2004 18:35:46 GMT

What Love Can Make You Do

And so they say "true love conquers all." About a month ago, my own experience has proven how true that statement is. Love does prevail in the midst of all the confusion and rough times in any relationship. If one truly loves the other, the relationship has a better chance og working out. And just a few days ago, one of my friends was crying her eyes out, promising herself that she would never love anyone ever again because she had lost her heart to someone who broke it. I was probably the last person to learn about the state she was in, and felt bad I wasn't there for her earlier. But I felt worse knowing that the guy had told her to just "shut up and leave [him] alone." It turns out he was just feeling paranoid that she was telling her friends about their "relationship," and he might have thought that she made him lok like a jerk, which had absolutely no truth to it at all. I have no idea how he got the idea! All I know is that stressing yourself out over nothing will just put you in jeopardy of dying early being filled with anxiety, haha

Anyway, there I was sitting on the staircase listening to my friend cry and desperately try to explain herself, which she really didn't need to do because I remember perfectly well what she said about the guy. i knew she loved him, for she never spoke ill-words towards him from the very beginning. All she said was nice things about him, even though we told her every single time they had an argument that she deserved better. No matter how many times the guy inflicted pain into her heart, she always found it in her soul to forgive him and always found the good in him by defending him & justifying his actions. When she came running to us to tell us the latest obstacle in their relationship and we pointed out to her that things didn't seem right anymore, she never found the ability to be mad at him. So after all the tears had been shed, my brother and I took turns giving the best possible advice about how she could go on with her life to find someone better. Assuming she would be fine, knowing that she had a new conviction of moving forward, we said our good-byes.

The next day we received a text message from her telling us that she had called the guy, and they both decided to give "it' another try. i found myself asking "give WHAt another try?" Anyway, she was apologizing for giving in once again. Indeed she had no reason to be sorry for anything she's done. people are free to do whatever they please with their lives; we all have the ability to do whatever we went to do. And especially when it comes to matters of the heart, there is no way of telling one's self to force our heart to feel something when it isn't there, or ignore a feeling that IS there. No matter how many people's advice we hear, it always ends up with our own gut feeling. You end up ignoring what everybody tells you you should do.

It's funny how love makes you do the craziest things. You forgive more easily, you laugh at the lamest jokes. The littlest things light up your day and make you look forward to tomorrow. love makes you sacrifice more often; it finds reason to everything. When you try to pull away from it, it pulls you back in. You find yourself longing for it even though you've felt like you've already been cheated of the sweetest thing possible. There's true Love, which most people claim comes just once in our lifetime. if two people are meant to be together, nothing can ever stand in their way. They always find a way to to be together. Though the road is bumpy and unclear, they take it. It may not always seem like a good idea at first, especially to everyone who thought there is no longer a chance for them to make it through, these people in love will take that risk. Just as I had said earlier, if it is true love, it WILL conquer all.